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PKEW PKEW PKEW Brew Brew Brew Beer That's Good For You, We Think

These guys are definitely not boring or sober.

Photo By Brittany Farhat Iron Maiden. AC/DC. Motörhead. KISS. PKEW PKEW PKEW. What do all of these bands have in common besides their loud rock’n’roll? They all have their own custom beer. Well, actually one of them has had two beers named after them, and surprisingly it’s the one from Toronto that hasn’t sold tens of million records. PKEW PKEW PKEW had that honor bestowed upon them: because their music is so indebted to beer consumption, it screams for a brand partnership. In fact, their reputation is so strong that beer companies like Old Vienna have begun using the band’s enthusiasm for shot-gunning to promote their brand. This is all the result of PKEW PKEW PKEW’s approach to songwriting: write simple, uncomplicated anthems about what you know. And it just so happens that these four Toronto dudes know a lot about building beer can pyramids, eating pizza to avoid a drunken pukefest, attempting skateboard tricks beyond their capacity and confronting noisy asshole neighbors.

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After spending the last few years releasing music on small indie labels, PKEW PKEW PKEW prepared what they see as their debut album proper for Royal Mountain Records (PUP, Alvvays, Hollerado). This turn of professionalism is undoubtedly a shot at building their audience and spreading their message of beer, pizza and rock and roll, but it’s probably as much to do with getting more craft breweries to put their name on another IPA. And they should be hopeful. PKEW PKEW PKEW’s self-titled LP is 22 minutes of tasty guitar licks, raucous gang vocals and ecstatic lyrics so penetrating they’ll stick in your brain after that sixth tallboy. So, perfect tunes for any brewery’s summertime ad campaign.

Noisey: I always feel like a kid when I say the band’s name.

Mike Warne:

We’ve said it a million times, and when we do it’s always “p-yoo, p-yoo, p-yoo,” but it’s kind of based on your level of enthusiasm. It’s a good way to read people like to see if they’re excited for us to be there. Usually, people make a weird laser beam noise. That’s the most common one.

How important is it to write (gunshots) in parentheses after the name?
We decided that it’s not important because it’s not necessarily supposed to be shots from a gun. But some of our stuff has it, some of our stuff doesn’t. We let it slide if it does, though. Some people call us Gunshots. When we made the name it was kind of this thing where people could call us whatever they wanted.

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You guys re-recorded some of your hits for this self-titled record that appeared on Glory Days. Were those songs just too good to not get the attention they deserved with this more prominent release?
I guess we just decided there weren’t any rules we had to follow on that. We wanted to put them out in a larger capacity, I suppose. We didn’t feel like we got them bang-on right the first time, so we just recorded them again.

You’ve said this band was started because you were quote; “annoyed with all the bands in Toronto that were really artsy bands and really boring to watch.” That was a few years ago. Do you think the city has turned a corner with the type of bands it’s produced?
Yeah, I think there are some great bands here now. I think there were great bands here then as well, just not exactly what I wanted to see. There are a ton of great bands coming out of Toronto. The obvious ones are PUP and the Dirty Nil [Ed. Note: Technically they’re a Hamilton band]. Those guys are doing great right now. I like artsy boring bands, but what I like most about your album is just how direct the lyrics are. They’re just about “drinking and being shitty” as you say. How much are the lyrics a reflection of your lifestyle?
Yeah, I think pretty well every song is something that has happened, and we wrote about it. We were just going for bluntness in the lyrics. Like no metaphors, just this is what it is and it’s maybe kind of funny but it’s funny because it’s real and a bit mundane as well. We just want to sit around, drink beers and hang out. When you hear songs and really listen to the lyrics and have no idea what they’re talking about, you assume that behind the song there is some kind of life story but you’re not getting it, and so you just don’t know. We wanted to avoid that completely.

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Well, I do appreciate a song about ordering and then eating a pizza. But I think by using gang vocals really helps with the triviality. Especially when it comes to hearing these songs in an audience. It’s fun to yell out these lyrics.
That was the idea when we started the band, to make songs that people could learn at a show when they were hearing them for the first time and sing along instantly. Sometimes it works. It’s been going good, just keeping the lyrics short and very to the point.

That’s another thing I like about the record: it’s really short and to the point.
My thought process is why don’t we just make another record sometime soon? If we’ve got songs. I wanted to make this the length of a sitcom, just because most of my favorite records are pretty short. That’s what I love about that Single Mothers album–it’s 19 minutes. But when it’s over I put it back on again. To me, that’s the coolest thing. I can just listen to it again.

So how did you get your own beer from the Collective Arts brewery?
We submitted them our album cover and then turned it down because the LCBO won’t allow a little kid on a beer bottle label. And they needed another one quickly, so the kid on the album cover is our old guitar player Jordan [Orava], so I just got a grown up photo of Jordan and that’s on the label now.

Do you get a lifetime supply or what?
I wish. I don’t know. I haven’t actually talked them about it yet. I haven’t seen the bottle in the flesh.

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I guess you guys can’t sell the beer at a merch table.
No, not in Ontario. But that would be amazing. We would love to be able to do it. Someone made us a beer once before, actually. Like a home brew. But it would be cool if we could at least sell beer out of the back of our van.

Since you guys love beer so much, what is your favorite brand?
I don’t know, I think it changes. Like you drink Pabst for a year and then you can’t drink it anymore, so you move on to Pilsner, and then go back to Old Milwaukee. Something cheap, though. Something very cheap.

Any import? Do you even go to that section?
[laughs] I don’t know. I guess if we’re drinking the cheapest beer than we’re drinking a strong IPA like a Boneshaker. So you start the night with Boneshaker and then fill out the rest of the night with Pabst.

You mention Boneshaker. Is that your favorite local craft brew?
Yeah, I think so. Probably the go-to for me.

Any premium beer you prefer?
I like Mill Street. I was a big Stock Ale guy for a while.

Okay, what about American beer?
Well, we were just in the States and we were drinking Genesee, Natty Ice and Labatt Blue Royale Light.

Shit, that sounds fancy. That sounds like a Canadian beer that you can only get in the U.S.
I think that’s what it is. I need to look into it. I thought it was funny because it comes in a blue bottle and it’s very fancy and kind of expensive for an American beer. But it’s 6.1 percent. I’m not sure what’s going on with it. It’s definitely a weird thing, but pretty good.

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And when you go to the Beer Store what cheap beer do you go straight to?

Probably

Laker Ice.

I figured PBR would be the cheap beer of choice because it’s in the video for “Prequel To Asshole Pandemic.”

Yeah, that or OV. We’ve got another video coming out that has OV beer in it.

I see some kind of theme here. You really are just trying to get endorsement deals beer companies, aren’t you?
Yeah. Like maybe some day someone will send us some beer. That would be cool. Like we have to be drinking in the videos. We have to. So we might as well try to get something out of it.

How many shows have you played where you were paid in beer?
I don’t know. We’ve done the odd open bar, but I don’t know if we’ve been paid in beer. We did a beer festival at Steamwhistle and they gave us a ton of beer. It was awesome. Are there any cities you’ve played where you haven’t gotten drunk?
I think we did one sober show in Toronto. I remember playing really well. It must have been after a real bad one. It’s fun to talk in the van before we play about how many beers we’ll have. Four or five always seems like the magic number but it never works out that way. We notice the difference. I think there are ways in which the show in enhanced by us drinking. But there are also ways in which it is not. Overall I think we have more fun with people if we’re ready for fun.

Cam Lindsay is a writer living in Toronto. Follow him on Twitter.