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Music

The Best "What Are Thoooooooose?" Songs, Reviewed

One question for Soundcloud: WHAT ARE THOOOOOOOOSE?

I remember the day vividly, the day everything changed. It was a warm afternoon in the middle of June (the 19th, to be precise), and I pulled my iPhone 6+ out of my pocket to check Vine. There before me was the meme of the summer: A man asking a police officer if he could ask him a question, a quick pan up to the sky and then back down to the officer’s shoes, culminating with the cameraman yelling, “WHAT ARE THOSE!?” At that point the video was only semi-viral, racking up a few hundred likes and revines by some content aggregating accounts. But by the end of the day, the video had fully achieved viral status.

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A video posted by Snapchat @youngbusco (@youngbusco) on Jun 14, 2015 at 10:55am PDT

Brands and human brands alike were scouring the internet for relatable and foot-centric pictures to riff on the joke. The magic of the joke is it takes a simple premise: clowning someone (in this case, their footwear, but can be applied to all aspects of life) and mixes it with an unlikely target (in this case, a police officer). The meme spread like wildfire. The Yeezys fell victim, the President was fried yung, and even confirmed heartthrob Harry Styles couldn’t escape its vice-like grip. Many called it the most easily consumable meme since Kermit Sips Tea, and as a meme expert myself, I agreed.

WHAT ARE THOOOOOOOOSSSSEEE pic.twitter.com/Uc6cbL6yS2

— ✨tasty husband✨ (@bootymath) June 20, 2015

Yet, like all memes, it had a shelf life. The first brand to appropriate the meme was Burger King. I feared this was the day the meme would die. All that we had worked for, gone in a poof at the hands of corporate hegemony. To my surprise, What Are Those lived another day. Yesterday afternoon saw the meme take another hit in the form of Katy Perry, known appropriator of all cultures and good things.

To many, it was the final death knell, and I almost agreed with them. That is, until I found the bevy of "WHAT ARE THOSE?" slappers on Soundcloud. It was then I knew: The meme will never die, not while there’s still hope and a sick drop. So I present: The best "What Are Those?" songs on the internet:

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Continued below…

What Are Those? - DJ T Marq (Feat. 809, China & A-RODney King) @DJTmarq @ThatDude809

There are so many wannabe Jersey Club remixes of WHAT ARE THOSE!? and this is the one I crown the champion of them all. Plus, it's a free download!

"What are Those" Vine Dance beat Prod. by Dices

This is more Baltimore Club than Jersey Club, but genres are a social construct, and the bottom line is this: It’s a banger.

What Are Those /(REMIX))

Their name might be DJ Inappropriate, but this remix is very appropriate. That’s my time folks, thanks for coming out and drive home safely!

WHAT ARE THOOOOOOOSE

This isn’t a typical trap song; however, the bouncier overtones with the heavier drum kit works well to balance each other.

WHAT ARE THOSE | @KenKenProd

We finally found the song of the summer.

Alex Hancock has one question for you. Find out what it is on Twitter.