Watching Britney Spears Paint Is Total Serenity

You may remember that in late 2017, on top of being a Grammy award-winning musician, humanitarian, and contemporary cultural legend, Britney Jean Spears also became a painter. In November, Britney sold a painting to Robin Leach for $10,000, which was then donated to charity.

While making this painting, she recorded her Process via a video, which is soundtracked by Mozart, and until this morning remained the most purely good thing I have ever observed on the internet (other than maybe the content of the Twitter account @round_boys, thank me later.) This morning, however, perusing Britney's social media as I love to do, I noticed that she had posted a new painting video. Please observe:

I have never known an oasis of peace like the one that washed over me when I first watched this video – nay, this moving art – featuring Britney Spears and her sons painting on canvases set up in a garden. This video should be shown to every group of men fighting on a British high street on a Saturday night at 11:30PM, to melt away all their rage into earnest tears and a productive conversation about the expectations placed on them by society and toxic masculinity. This video could solve wars. It could end international conflicts. It is pure serenity, in every way:

1) Silence Unlike the previous glimpse given by Britney into her craft, this video is not accompanied by an uplifting classical track, but instead it is silent. The three artists are at one with their work, absorbed by it, and we too are invited to be alone with our thoughts by their example.

2) Location If heaven is real, there's definitely a small corner of it – maybe between the part where you can literally pet every dog, and the vending machine which reads your mind and presents you with exactly what you want to eat even when you yourself do not consciously know – which is a painting class, taught by Britney Spears, in a garden much like this one. Presumably this is Britney's garden, and it is lush, and green, and sunny, and everything about it makes me feel centred and calm.

3) The paintings themselves

Britney is doing a bird and a bit of foliage on a tiny canvas, and if doesn't make you feel serene as all fuck then we're fundamentally different.

4) Britney's belly top Some things are just true and when I am feeling sad or anxious or shit about the world I like to remember them. Time will keep going, the sun will always come out, Britney Spears will always, always be wearing a belly top. This one has frills. Everything is amazing.

5) The all-white ensembles Of course the new patron saint of painting (sorry Catherine of Bologna but there's a new saint in town, and her name is Britney) wears white. Get me a white polo shirt and a canvas and some pound shop paints and make me your disciple, Britney. I am ready to be saved.

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