Basedball

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  • Alex Rodriguez, All-American

    In all circumstances and in every way he comes off alien and affluence-perverted and so perversely and simultaneously self-regarding and oblivious that only the word "Miami" seems capable of summing it all up. His soul is upholstered in teal leather...

  • Baseball Is Basically a Random Number Generator

    Baseball is too random to predict games, and even more so in October, when things get so tense you can puke.

  • The Less Crappy Referees Are Back

    What happened last week in sports? The fake football referees really blew it, so the real referees returned. Some baseball teams made the playoffs, and a hockey player got real emotional on Twitter.

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  • Thank You NFL for Saving Our Sundays

    Football has started, and football football football. Also, Chipper Jones gets a gift, some Duke basketball guy is in court for having too much awesome jewelry, and there might not be hockey this season.

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