Australia Today

THIS WEEK ONLINE – Supermarket Shoplifting

Plus: Blow nation, landlord wrangling and more...
Arielle Richards
Melbourne, AU
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You’re reading This Week Online, VICE Australia’s runsheet of shit you probably missed, or should have seen, this week. Subscribe here to get it straight in your inbox, every week.


"Ari" here, welcoming you back to This Week Online

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WHAT HAPPENED 
19/05 – 26/05

  • Supermarkets care about YOU
  • Living in a COCAINE NATION
  • How to ruin your landlord [they’re definitely trying to ruin you]
  • Music recc from the Music Desk: d4vd
  • Weekend guide recommendation for Melbourne
  • The funnies


SUPERMARKETS CARE ABOUT YOU

via getty

via getty

Your weekly reminder to gently rob supermarkets blind is here, in the form of a new analysis by Guardian Australia revealing our supermarket duopoly have come out on top amid this terrible quagmire of post-pandemic cozzie livs. According to the report: Coles’ gross margin rose from 24.7 per cent pre-pandemic to 26.5 per cent today, while Woolworths’ food sales margins increased from 29.1 per cent to 30.7 per cent. As VICE Australia’s Aleks Bliszczyk surmises: “Coles and Woolworths are just two more notches on the bedpost while we get fucked by high inflation.” 

Coles and Woolies plead that it was all just a result of smart moves on their part, something to do with cigarettes and margins and suppliers. They assure the customer that they have the customers’ best interests at heart. A report analysing the costs of 60,000 supermarket items published by investment bank UBS on Tuesday noted supermarket products became 9.6% more expensive from April 2022 to April 2023. 

None of this is illegal. But you know what should be illegal? Paying $18 for a bag of nuts. But, don’t worry, just remember, these giant conglomerates whose entire business model is hinged on costing basic necessities in their own favour, definitely want what’s best for you.

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lol

LIVING IN A COCAINE NATION

Australians are the highest per capita blow users in the world. This is crazy, especially considering we pay insane sums for it – one of the highest average prices in the world. I had the honour of interviewing Mahmood Fazal, an investigative reporter – and former VICE writer – whose recent documentary about Australia’s cocaine trade delivered a clear-eyed, empathetic, unbiased look into the various lives touched by the cocaine trade. 

It’s one of the best pieces of crime reporting I’ve seen, and naturally I had lots of questions. Where did he find these people? The outlaw motorcycle club member doubling as an airport door for Latin American cartels, the gay Lebanese dealer who went from the streets to dealing $16,000 evenings with clientele made at her corporate job, the street pusher who cuts his coke with Panadol sprayed with hairspray and tamped down with a bottle of Chanel Bleu…..

here ]



HOW TO RUIN YOUR LANDLORD [THEY'RE DEFINITELY TRYING TO RUIN YOU]

via getty

via getty

More enlightening information from comrade Aleks Bliszczyk of VICE Australia…. Yes, your landlord might be trying to ruin you. In more ways than just emptying your pockets in exchange for a roof over your head then refusing to fix said roof when the mould eats through it and the water from the rains starts leaking through it and you’re wondering who's bad dream you’ve entered into and you realise its yours but you’re not waking up, you’re not waking up. 

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Aleks spoke with a property lawyer, who dished and delved into all the potential traps in which a landlord might try to snare you, and how to snare them right back.

here ]



MUSIC RECC FROM THE MUSIC DESK

Coming in hot from the music and culture desk is d4vd. 

Just months ago, the Queens-born 18-year-old was making music on his phone and enjoying TikTok virality. And now he’s in Sydney, with his parents and manager, about to perform at Mary’s Underground. VICE Australia’s Julie Fenwick interviewed d4vd pre-show, all about his 15-month circuit in the music industry, from making Fortnite compilations in his bedroom to commanding the international stage. 

here ]



WEEKEND GUIDE RECOMMENDATION: MELBOURNE

VIA 2 ON BY @honey_star.s

VIA 2 ON BY @honey_star.s

If you go to one thing this weekend, make it 2 ON, at Miscellania. If you don’t know 2 ON, I fear you might not be following the right people. It’s a party series run by DJ Tinika Pasinetti and model/actress/We Eatin Good Bitch creator Matisse Laida. If you’ve never been to a 2 ON party before, it’s “Hot, sexy, sweaty, queer, wholesome ‘n’ whoresome”, Matisse told VICE. Their headliner, Martyn Bootyspoon, hails from Canada, and is a “certified canadian baddie”. Aside from the incredible and glamorous name, Bootyspoon is an incredible DJ beloved by all for his “aloof sexiness” and “hilarious online presence”.

See you there.

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EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW IN AUSTRALIA TODAY

FEWER than nine days now remain to pay it off. But here's a handy explainer of why your HECS is about to go TF UP!! And what you can do about it. Spoiler... the solution sucks ass.

here ]


The funnies






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