Remember in the high school smoke pit how you would be hanging out, passing one Virginia Slim between three of your friends, and a teacher would come out and yell at you? Remember how anytime you were close to failing a class, or even just late, your teacher would warn you how important it is to pass high school? You need your education! I know it doesn’t seem important now, but it will be later! Then, they would threaten you with he idea of having to go to summer school. You’d roll your eyes. Whatever, lady. Turns out Drake was one of those non-graduating eye rollers.
Recently Drake told NOW magazine that he is going to be spending his summer finishing up his high school courses to get his diploma. “That’s my main focus after OVO Fest,” he said. “I only have one credit left, and I’m really excited about that.”
The obvious and ironic comedy here is that Drake kickstarted his career with the role of Jimmy Brooks on Degrassi, a show about high school. Now, we know that when Drake says he’s going to “finish high school this summer,” it actually means that his private tutor will be laying poolside with him, going over trigonometry assignments as he floats on a giant rubber inner tube sipping champagne through a crazy straw. But what if Drake had to go back to school, to Degrassi?
Drake makes his limo drop him off two blocks from the high school and walks the rest of the way. He doesn't want any extra attention. Today is already going to be hard enough, as he is the only super famous rapper and singer in summer school. He makes sure to put his iPhone on mute before entering into the big, cold building. Drake feels nervous. He's the odd man out. He’s not normal in this world.
He enters his first class. Every kid in the room is wearing a shirt with his face on it. He can’t tell if they are doing it to mock him or if they love him and it’s a coincidence. Drake goes to the bathroom to text The Weeknd about the shirt thing.
Drake goes to the front office to discuss his class schedule with a student advisor. He needs to change a few things to make sense of his busy, superstar schedule. The woman at the front desk is smiling at Drake, making eyes and being very flirtatious. He’s always wanted to have sex at high school. This is the chance he’s been waiting for. He wishes that someone would get it on camera.
Instead of eating lunch with everyone else Drake decides to have the limo take him to get frozen yogurt from Pinkberry. The shirt thing was too much, and he still hasn’t gotten to the bottom of it. As he waits in the back of the limo for his hun-cal froyo treat, he gets an idea for a new melody in his head and starts humming. He hums the melody into his iPhone voice recorder. It will become his big hit of the fall.
After the last class of the day, Drake makes his way out of the school. Suddenly, he's stopped by a group of his classmates who want to talk with him about his career. Now that school is out, they can ask questions. He gladly talks with his fellow students for a bit. One mouthy boy tells Drake that he is not the first rapper and singer. Drake tells him to “shut up.” The lip each other off for a minute or two until the teenager pushes Drake, but Drake knows he cannot hit a minor. It will be all over the press. He walks away, angry with himself for not clocking the kid but also really proud of his restraint. He decides to quit school and get a tutor. Real school is too much for a superstar.