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Music

What Does Awful Music Think of the Polaris Prize Short List?

We asked Keithcharles Spacebar and Father what they'd pick as the best Canadian album of the year.

Watch the video on Daily Vice

During their stop in Toronto, Awful Record artists Father and Keithcharles Spacebar took some time out of their schedules to give their opinions on the best piece of Canadian music released this year, going over the Polaris Prize short list of 10 best Canadian albums. “What are all these up for?” asked Father halfway through the exercise. “The Polaris Prize? What do you get if you win that? $15,000?? $50,000?!?!!?!”

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“And why am I not getting this?” asked Keithcharles. “You have to be Canadian? Like, born here? That’s bullshit, y’all already got free healthcare. Can I just say I’m Canadian? Can I just become Canadian?”

Although they made a worthy case for why they need to be considered for the 2016 Polaris Prize short list (“I’d marry a Canadian,” said Father) the two Atlanta “weird” rappers gave their best shot at deciphering the scattershot of genres presented on the short list. We had them listen to each of the artists before giving us a brief explanation of what they thought of each act. “What if we get the deciding decisions on all of this?” asked Keithcharles Spacebar. “Like if it’s a tie and they look back on this video like ‘well, the Americans said…’” In case that ends up happening, here are Awful Record’s choices for the Polaris Prize in 2015.

BADBADNOTGOOD, Ghostface Killah and Danny Brown - “Six Degrees”

Keithcharles Spacebar: This BADBADNOTGOOD? They fire.
Father: I thought it was some Canadian trying to sound like Ghostface, but now that I know it is Ghostface I like it. It’s tight.

Buffy Sainte Marie - “Farm in the Middle of Nowhere”

Spacebar: I like the melody. It makes me feel all good inside. Sounds like she’s just finished baking a pie and putting it on the window sill.
Father: It’s some good ole boy music. Maybe if she was talking about fucking or something I’d enjoy it. She has a nice voice, but yeah this is some “bake a pie and leave it on the window sill to cool” music.

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Braids - “Warm Like Summer”

Spacebar: Nah this shit hard as fuck.
Father: I feel like if I dropped some shit like this my fans would hate me. But I like it. Throw an 808 on it and this would blow up in Atlanta.

Caribou - “Second Chance”

Spacebar: I fuck with Caribou, he’s playing with the oscillators as the synth is playing, it’s very nice, but I’m gonna need a drop in there somewhere.
Father: This beat is weird, it’s real off key. Oh he has a PhD in mathematics? He should’ve just dropped out of school and not studied mathematics. It’s not worth it. Mathematics for music? This shit sounds like an algebra equation. I’m an asshole, he’s gonna hate me after this. Throw some 808s on it.

Jennifer Castle - “Pink City”

Spacebar: I like her voice.
Father: I’m about to sample this and throw some 808s on it. Throw some 808s on that bitch and it’s going up!

Drake - “Preach”

Spacebar: Is this on the list? I love this song. Hoe’s panties just melting off. Winner.
Father: Clear winner. Drake doesn’t need the $50,000, he should give it to one of the broker artists, but this is the tightest song so far. I really feel this song because when it came out I was out in Miami and most of those hoes were too messy and I needed some time to myself, so it was very true to my heart.

The New Pornographers - “Spidyr”

Spacebar: I like this. The voice is great.
Father: They sound like they’ve been doing this for at least 30 years. What’s with that harmonica? They should’ve left that out of here, he just fucked it up. It’s very Vampire Weekend, I fucks with Ezra. This makes me wanna say less words in my music, because apparently all I need to do is repeat “spider” and I can get $50,000. Why am I writing long ass verses for?

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Tobias Jesso Jr. - “Leaving L.A.”

Father: This guy has great hair. Why does everyone sound so classically trained and shit? I need to take some fucking lessons or something. I’m sampling all of this shit. I like the slow creep, the build up. They gotta drop an 808 on that motherfucker and fuck the club up.
Spacebar: They not tryna fuck the club up, they tryna fuck up the ranch. Canadians have really great music, you guys are killing the game. Nice voices, pretty piano. I like the buildup.

Viet Cong - “Bunker Buster”

Father: It took too long for the vocals to come in and I got annoyed with the song.

Alvvays - “Party Police”

Spacebar: I’d date her. I love her voice, she sounds cute.
Father: She probably ain’t that cute. She sound chubby, not that there’s anything wrong with that, but she sounds like a chubby girl.

And The Winner Is …

Father: New Pornographers or Drake. I love that Drake song but he doesn’t need anymore prizes, but besides him I’d give it to The New Pornographers. Drake won no matter what, but I don’t wanna give him the money.
Spacebar: I gotta give it to Braids. Not only is their name sick but I like the drum & bass element. You guys need to use more 808s though, even the folk songs. Do you wanna fuck up the club or not? Stop trying to fuck up the country club, Canada. They turning up the tennis courts.

Slava Pastuk is the editor of Noisey Canada and a Polaris Prize juror - @SlavaP