Baseball is a sport steeped in tradition—the four-pitch intentional walk, Rex Ryan wearing an "I'd Hit That" T-shirt, visual ipecac food gimmicks. Behold the latest monstrosity: the burger- and bacon-wrapped hot dog. Who among us has not looked upon a bacon-wrapped hamburger and thought, You know, this is pretty good, but if someone could pierce it with a hot dog, I could die happy. Or, who among us has not looked upon a hot dog and thought, You know, this is pretty good, but if someone could jam it inside a hamburger that is wrapped in bacon, I could die happy.The good news is, I don't know about happy, but you would definitely die a whole lot sooner than anticipated. And for what? On top of being objectively immoral and reprehensible, it doesn't even look appetizing. The bacon looks like sautéed onions. The burger appears to be covered in whatever Good Humor puts on a Toasted Almond. The hot dog has the meat sweats because it is being suffocated by two other types of meat.It's hard to imagine a worse, lazier idea than stuffing a burger between two pizzas, but this might actually do it.NEW: Bacon-Wrapped, BURGER-Wrapped Hot Dog Headlines @Rangers & @Royals Spring Training Menu https://t.co/GhriQXrtpe #abc15 pic.twitter.com/dzC77277aI
— Kari Van Horn (@KariVanHorn) February 24, 2017