Anybody else already completely burnt-out on Valentine's Day? I propose we all quit agonizing over what meal/gift/card combination will make your lady-friend/man-friend/fleshlight most likely to sex you and take a minute to celebrate the real holiday that's slipped somewhat under the radar today: Wayne's World turns the big 2-0!
Let's take a look at some classic scenes made great by classic songs. Warning: I am not liable when you inevitably shout "PARTY TIME! EXCELLENT!" during whatever weird shit you get up to later tonight.
Queen - "Bohemian Rhapsody"
Not singing along to "Bohemian Rhapsody" with a group of friends is like sneezing with your eyes open: it's almost always physically impossible, but when it does happen, it's horrifying and the individual is ostracized for it. Just barely past the opening credits, Wayne's World already lays it in with one of the most memorable performances of this song ever (unless you once saw your 7-year-old brother sing it alone for karaoke at a crowded Club Med bar 9 years ago).
Gary Wright - "Dreamweaver"
Dudes: Want to know how to make your lady's heart melt on Valentine's Day? Spoiler alert: Wayne gets the girl in the end. Just saying.
The Jimi Hendrix Experience - "Foxy Lady"
Garth also gets the girl in the end. Obviously.
Alice Cooper - "Feed My Frankenstein"
If we had more showmanship like this in whatever genre hybrid some uninspired music blogger's decided to coin today, the world would be a much better place. Come on, when was the last time you heard someone chanting "WE ARE NOT WORTHY" at the Knitting Factory? And no, I don't mean that one guy shouting it facetiously after some shitty glitch-step set that no one showed up to.
Tia Carrere - "Ballroom Blitz" (The Sweet cover)
Some reputable music critics, like the commenters on the IMDB message boards, argue that Tia Carrere is the "worst singer ever," but it's not exactly like The Sweet frontman Brian Connolly was exactly a Luciano Pavarotti or anything. Plus, Carrere is a model and a former Star Search contestant with Spanish, Chinese, and Filipino blood. If that's good enough for Wayne Campbell, it's good enough for me.
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Ace of Base's Secret Nazi Past
Before he founded Ace of Base, Ulf Ekberg was a member of Commit Suiside, a Nazi punk band.
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Parquet Courts - "Light Up Gold Road Trip" (Full Documentary)
In this new documentary, Noisey follows rising indie rockers Parquet Courts from Mexico to Texas and London as they tour to support their debut LP, 'Light Up Gold.'
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Yung Lean Doer Is the Weirdest 16-Year-Old White Swedish Rapper You'll Hear This Week
Yung Lean raps over pillow-fluffy beats and raps about glory holes and Arizona Iced Tea. Who the fuck is this kid? And why is he like this?
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Adam Ant - The British Masters, Chapter 6
Noisey's John Doran talks with the great post-punk pop star Adam Ant about tribal body mods and layering tape.
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Photos: Taking Acid at Coachella
When Paley sent these photos in, she included a nice little caveat over email that we've decided to reprint here in full, not only because it's too good to edit, but because her photographs of her and her weird buddies riding the snake are some of the best
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R.I.P. Storm Thorgerson (1944-2013)
On Thursday, the hyper-talented graphic designer, artist, and famed album cover creator Storm Thorgerson passed away after a battle with cancer. He was 69 years old.
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The Internet Is Scary
As of six months ago, my Facebook fanpage is like a dojo where hormonal teenagers hone their technique. Here is a heartfelt poem from some kid who wants to rape, kill, and marry me.
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I Accidentally Touched Little Richard's Butt One Time
It was in the Detroit airport. After it happened Little Richard said, "He graze my derriere."
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Listen to St. Lucia's Remix of The Colourist's "Little Games"
Last month, Cali quartet the Colourist released "Little Games," and St. Lucia just pulled a warm Balearic blanket over the whole thing, sanding away its rough edges with bright synths and lightly gated percussion.
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Aaron Montaigne, Godfather of Screamo, is More Interesting Than You Can Ever Hope to Be - Part Two
On surviving combat in Iraq and Afghanistan with the help of magic, 'Bladerunner,' and everything in between.
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