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Rick Ross Holding a Baby Leopard

Instagram Report

By Martin Spasov

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So, Rick Ross is lovingly cradling a leopard cub in his lap. Rozay, who recently announced his next album will be titled Mastermind, is probably a pretty smart dude—the guy hustled his way from being Trina’s weed carrier to sharing tracks with Jay-Z and Dr. Dre. So I’m pretty sure that behind this “candid” image of Rozay and his pet leopard actually staged as fuck and there's a team of like five zoologists making sure Rozay doesn’t get mauled by its claws or have his dick bitten off by its razor-sharp talons or melted by its laser eyes or whatever else leopards do that is scary.

Ross seems pretty safe, though, because that leopard looks pretty terrified. If I had to guess, it's because Ross is wearing a fur coat, which isn't exactly sensitive when dealing with a furry animal who is both adorable and very, very deadly. The leopard probably saw the coat and thought he was next to go. And look at Rick Ross’s face. Definitely thinking some #BOSS #SHIT #IN #HASHTAGS: #ThisIsMyLeopard. #IWonderWhatLeopardMeatsTasteLike.

The best part? The caption is, “Come & $uck a D**k for a Millionaire. #TwoKings." Like, what? Is he expecting the leopard to suck his dick? Rick Ross is, evidently, a modern-day, plus-sized Cruella de Vil. But with leopards. Who are scared.

 

Martin Spasov wishes he were rich forever. Instead he just a broke-ass intern and hater. Twitter him at @RealMarvon

 

 

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