Reviews

Rich Kids' "Straight Like That 3" Is Kinda Good

By The Kid Mero

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Download Straight Like That 3 at LiveMixtapes.

[Ed. Note: The Kid Mero is a Bronx-based writer and comedian specializing in #KNOWLEDGEDARTS and #COKEDREAMS. Most importantly, he's our new Reviews Editor over at Noisey. He sent us an all-caps email threatening to "GENTLY KARATE CHOP [US] IN THE BREAST" if we changed any part of his reviews, so we'll be running them unedited on a daily basis from here on out.]

YO YOU KNOW WHEN YOU LEAVE YOUR SPEAKERS PLUGGED IN ON BLAST AND TURN SOME SHIT ON AND IT COMES OUT AT STARTLING VOLUMES? THIS WHAT JUST HAPPENED WITH THIS RICH KIDZ SHIT AND THE FIRST JOINT HAS SOME NIGGA SINGIN "YOU WOOOOONNNN" IN HIS BEST RYAN LESLIE DOING A MICHAEL JACKSON R KELLY IMPRESSION. BEAT WAS KINDA TOUGH THO. MOSTLY THE BEATS ON THIS SHIT ARE KINDA GOOD NAHMEAN, WITH A COUPLE LAME ICE CREAM BABY NIPPLE CARNIVAL GAME BEATS. ALSO THIS NIGGA SAID A LINE ABOUT "IM LIKE A RASTA HANDLIN THE CHOPPA IN MY BOXERS" I NEVER KNEW JAMAICAN NIGGAS WAS OUT HERE SHOOTING OFF AK'S IN THEY UNDERWEAR. I'MA HAVE TO HOLLA AT MY NIGGA RUDDY AND SEE IF THIS IS TRUE. I KNOW THIS IS GONNA SOUND LIKE SLANDER BUT IT'S NOT: THESE NIGGAS SOUND LIKE BABY FROGS DOING DRAKE MIXTAPE JOINTS. "KOOL ON THE LOW" IS A BANGER THO FOR REAL. WHEN I DOWNLOADED THIS SHIT NIGGAS SAID IN THE COMMENTS "THEY REALLY MATURED LYRICALLY" LIKE THESE NIGGAS WERE SPITTING SOME PHILOSOPHICAL IMMANUEL KANT SHIT! SON THESE NIGGAS TALKIN ABOUT BITCHES AND GETTING FLY AND ALL THAT REGULAR RAP SHIT BUT I AM ABSOLUTELY NOT MAD AT THESE BABY SNAPBACK NIGGAS. ONE OF THESE NIGGAS HAS A BANK OF AMERICA TATTOO ON HIS ABDOMEN WHICH I HAVENT DECIDED IF ITS GREAT OR THE WORST FUCKIN SHIT EVER YET. ALOT OF "SHE'S AN ATTRACTIVE FEMALE THAT IS ALSO SLUTTY SOMETIMES" JOINTS ON HERE AND THESE NIGGAS SCREAMING GOT KINDA GRATING HALFWAY THROUGH THE TAPE SO I WAS LIKE AIGHT IMA TURN THIS OFF SEND SOME EMAILS AND COME BACK. EXCEPT I ENDED UP EATING PEANUT BUTTER OUT THE JAR AND GOING ON TWITTER.

I GIVE THIS 3 PILES OF DUTCH GUTS OUTTA 5 BECAUSE THERE'S AN UNINTELLIGIBLE FUTURE VERSE ON HERE WHICH IS WASSUP.

STANDOUT TRACK: "KOOL ON THE LOW" BECAUSE NIGGAS TALK ABOUT EATING STRIP CLUB FOOD WHICH IS DEPLORABLE BUT I FUCKS WIT DEPLORABLE SHIT.
 

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