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Music

Putin Enlists Boyz II Men to Raise Russia's Birth Rate

Rhythm-N-Babymakin', coming soon to Moscow.

President of Russia and Man Behind the Curtain Vladimir Putin continues his quest to be an evil genius micromanager. R&B gods Boyz II Men are—allegedly and informally—teaming up with Putin to help raise the country's fledgling birth rate. The trio will hold a concert in Moscow on February 6th, just in time for Valentine's Day, when they'll don their white suits and make Russian women realize how much their men love them.

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Putin has been struggling to raise the birthrate in Russia since 2006, when he offered women a bonus of 250,000 rubles (about $9,200!) to have a second child. The hope is that Boyz II Men can help Russia's negative population growth rate reverse as smoothly and grown-n-sexily as humanly possible.

Russian concertgoers will get the chance to close their eyes, make a wish, and blow out the candle light on February 6th, for 3,000 rubles (that's $100, son. That's a steal.)

There's gonna be a lot of soulful clapping in Russia soon.

Martin Spasov has had sex to Boyz II Men II times. He's on Twitter - @RealMarvon