When you go into the recording studio and do vocal tracks, the sound engineer does this really awful thing where he or she cuts out all the instrumental tracks behind the vocals so he/she can play with the reverb, levels, whatever. He/she will crank up the vocals so loud that it echoes throughout the studio and, if you're the vocalist, you will shudder with embarrassment. At least, I do. Hearing your own voice scream all dry and alone is disgusting. It’s absolutely disgusting. However, when it’s other people’s heart-felt screams, I find it hilarious.
The other day my friend sent me “Running With The Devil” by Van Halen with all the instrumental tracks removed so it was just David Lee Roth hollering away. After giggling at Roth’s hilariously sexy yelps, I followed the YouTube rabbit hole of vocals-only tracks and found some gems. Enjoy.
(Question: Who are the people taking the time to make these videos? Seriously. I am dying to know.)
MEGADEATH – "PEACE SELLS"
Dave Mustaine sounds like he is doing high school girl beat poetry on each verse. “What do you mean I hurt your feelings? I didn’t know you had any feelings.” Sometimes, lyrics are not as embarrassing when they have guitars behind them. Standing alone, whoa. Kind of emo, dude.
LINKIN PARK – "NUMB"
Oh my God. As if Chester of Linkin Park has not embarrassed himself enough just by existing… Remove the “music” from this song and the vocals end up flip-flopping between Nick Carter to Boys to Men to Eddie Vedder. Who is be trying to sing like? What is the concept? Linkin Park is so confusing. The best part is the lyric “All I want to do is be more like me and be less like you. I might end up failing too, but I know that you were just like me…” What the fuck are you talking about?
VAN HALEN – "RUNNING WITH THE DEVIL"
The first 10 seconds of this song is just David Lee Roth doing little yelps, then he blasts into the verse, and then back to more yelps, screams, and a couple “I’ll tell ya all ‘bout it.” I imagine him singing this in front of his bedroom mirror while he tries on bikini bottoms and lip-gloss.
LAMB OF GOD – "EVERYTHING TO NOTHING"
This sounds like some cheesy joke track that they would play at a Halloween carnival to scare snarky, hot-headed teenagers who do not follow the rules. Cool burp at 2:12.
LED ZEPPLIN – "RAMBLE ON"
Robert Plant had a really beautiful voice (and an even better penis, am I right, ladies? Kidding.) But when you remove his old friend Jimmy’s guitar from the whole thing, it sounds like he’s giving the world’s most overly dramatic fake orgasm. It’s pretty great.
(If you want to learn how to sing like Robert Plant, this adult man with his cue cards and half-balding, half-flowing locks is happy to help you.)
THE ONLY SINGER WHO CAN MASTER VOCALS-ONLY:
HEART – "BARRACUDA"
Reverb does wonders sometimes, but Ann Wilson does not really need it. She’s basically singing Opera here. No auto-tuning or pitch correcting needed here (or available). Let’s hashtag this with “talent.”
-
Ace of Base's Secret Nazi Past
Before he founded Ace of Base, Ulf Ekberg was a member of Commit Suiside, a Nazi punk band.
-
Parquet Courts - "Light Up Gold Road Trip" (Full Documentary)
In this new documentary, Noisey follows rising indie rockers Parquet Courts from Mexico to Texas and London as they tour to support their debut LP, 'Light Up Gold.'
-
Yung Lean Doer Is the Weirdest 16-Year-Old White Swedish Rapper You'll Hear This Week
Yung Lean raps over pillow-fluffy beats and raps about glory holes and Arizona Iced Tea. Who the fuck is this kid? And why is he like this?
-
Adam Ant - The British Masters, Chapter 6
Noisey's John Doran talks with the great post-punk pop star Adam Ant about tribal body mods and layering tape.
-
Photos: Taking Acid at Coachella
When Paley sent these photos in, she included a nice little caveat over email that we've decided to reprint here in full, not only because it's too good to edit, but because her photographs of her and her weird buddies riding the snake are some of the best
-
R.I.P. Storm Thorgerson (1944-2013)
On Thursday, the hyper-talented graphic designer, artist, and famed album cover creator Storm Thorgerson passed away after a battle with cancer. He was 69 years old.
-
The Internet Is Scary
As of six months ago, my Facebook fanpage is like a dojo where hormonal teenagers hone their technique. Here is a heartfelt poem from some kid who wants to rape, kill, and marry me.
-
I Accidentally Touched Little Richard's Butt One Time
It was in the Detroit airport. After it happened Little Richard said, "He graze my derriere."
-
Listen to St. Lucia's Remix of The Colourist's "Little Games"
Last month, Cali quartet the Colourist released "Little Games," and St. Lucia just pulled a warm Balearic blanket over the whole thing, sanding away its rough edges with bright synths and lightly gated percussion.
-
Aaron Montaigne, Godfather of Screamo, is More Interesting Than You Can Ever Hope to Be - Part Two
On surviving combat in Iraq and Afghanistan with the help of magic, 'Bladerunner,' and everything in between.
NOW PLAYING ON YOUTUBE
Comments