Reviews

Joey Bada$$' 'Summer Knights' Is Excellent Weed Smoking Music from 1997

CAPS LOCK REVIEWS

By The Kid Mero

0

HAHA I PUT THIS ON AND WAS LIKE "MAN MY ITUNES IS FUCKIN UP IT'S PLAYING PUNK BARBARIANS B SIDES"

NIGGAS ARE MAD AT THIS DUDE CUZ HE'S A "HIPHOP PURIST" WHICH IS THE WORST TERM EVER.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? WHAT IS HIPHOP? WHY DON'T YOU TELL ME WHAT HIPHOP IS YOU FUCKIN 500G PRIVATE COLLEGE LOAN PAYING VEGAN JERKOFF? I'M FROM THE BRONX. BORN RAISED & DYING HERE. NEVER LIVED ANYWHERE ELSE AND I DON'T HAVE THE AUDACITY TO TELL NIGGAS "THIS IS HIPHOP", "THAT ISN'T HIPHOP" 

JOEY BADASS IS HIPHOP
FRENCH MONTANA IS HIPHOP
ACTION BRONSON IS HIPHOP
ERYKAH BADU IS HIPHOP
A MCCHICKEN WITH CHEESE AND EXTRA PICKLES IS HIPHOP
PLAYING XBOX AND TELLING WHITE TWEENS TO "STICK THEY GOGURT IN THEY GRANDMA RASCLAT PUSSYOLE" IS HIPHOP
MY DICK IS HIPHOP


 

I BET YOU NIGGAS THOUGHT I WAS GONNA GET SERIOUS HAHAHA. NEVER! YO THIS MIXTAPE IS REALLY EXCELLENT WEED SMOKING MUSIC. LIKE IF YOU HAVE A CRIB WITH A "SITTING ROOM" WITH BAY WINDOWS OR A FIRE ESCAPE THAT YOU AIN'T SCARED TO SIT ON FOR FEAR OF CATCHING A STRAY BULLET, THIS IS VERY APPROPRIATE TO SIT DOWN AND SMOKE A BLUNT WHILE YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES AND THINK ABOUT SITTING IN A ROWBOAT. YOU CAN EAT A WHOLE PINT OF BEN & JERRY'S HIGH TO THIS AND MAINTAIN A SOLID HEAD NOD THROUGHOUT. NIGGAS THAT WERE'NT AROUND IN NYC IN THE EARLY 90'S THINK THIS TYPE OF SHIT IS CORNY BECAUSE THERE'S NO MEMORIES ATTACHED TO THIS SOUND. THE ARGUMENT OF "IF I WANNA LISTEN TO GRAND PUBA I'LL LISTEN TO GRAND PUBA" IS A GOOD ONE BUT COME ON B. THIS LITTLE NIGGA CAN RAP AND HE HAS A GOOD EAR FOR BEATS. THIS SOUND IS VERY REFERENTIAL TO ME CUZ MY EARLIEST WEED GRAFFITI AND BJ IN THE PARK MEMORIES ARE ATTACHED TO THIS TYPE OF SHIT. MAYBE I'M THE WRONG GUY TO REVIEW THIS SHIT BECAUSE 90'S HIPHOP HOLDS A SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART AND THIS SHIT SOUNDS EXACTLY LIKE SOME 1997 SHIT.

THIS SHIT SOUNDS LIKE GOING UP ON THE ROOF TO GET A HANDY FROM JAYLEEN AND END UP SMASHING THEN GETTING CHASED OFF BY THE SUPER BEFORE YOU BUST A NUT.

THIS SHIT SOUNDS LIKE DUMPING PHILLY GUTS ON THE PLATFORM AT MT. EDEN AND KICKIN THEM ONTO THE TRACKS WITH SCUFFED TIMBS.

THIS SHIT SOUNDS LIKE WEARING A NORTHFACE JACKET THAT YOU ROBBED A BRONX SCIENCE KID FOR.

THIS SHIT SOUNDS LIKE WHEN 225TH HAD THE KENNEDY FRIED CHICKEN INSTEAD OF A MALL AND YOU DID A SCRATCHIE ON THE WINDOW WHILE YOU WAITED FOR YOUR CHEESEBURGER COMBO.

THIS SHIT SOUNDS LIKE WALKIN INTO THE BODEGA ON 187TH LIKE "AHKI LEMME GET TWO LONGS" *ARAB DUDE HANDS YOU TWO NEWPORT 100'S*

THE ONLY PROBLEM WITH THIS KID IS HIS HOLIER THAN THOU ATTITUDE ABOUT RAP MUSIC. LIKE SAYIN "I'M NOT DOING THIS SHOW IF SO & SO IS ON THE BILL"…THAT'S FUCKING CORNY DOG YOU ARE A YOUNG BABY HERSHEY KISS NIPPLE TEENAGER. YOU NEED TO PLAY YOUR POSITION AND BE HAPPY TO HAVE EXPOSURE CUZ ALOTTA NIGGAS ARE DOING WHAT YOU DO IN THEY MOM'S APARTMENT BEGGING FOR YOUTUBE VIEWS.

I GIVE THIS SHIT 3.5 PILES OF DUTCHGUTS OUTTA 5 CUZ IT'S REVISIONIST SHIT BUT THERE'S NIGGAS OUT THERE DRESSING LIKE ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT WEARING DASHIKIS AND SINGING ABOUT SCAT PARTIES. SO WHAT YOU RATHER LISTEN TO? I WOULDA GIVEN IT A 4 BUT I RAN OUTTA WEED.

STANDOUT TRACK: ALL THESE JOINTS KINDA SOUND THE SAME WHICH ISN'T NECESSARILY A BAD THING. "WORD IS BOND" IS GOOD CUZ THE TITLE SOUNDS LIKE I'M WALKING OUTTA THE BODEGA WITH A WHITE OWL AND A FISTFUL OF MANGO PINA.

 

The Kid Mero dispenses #KNOWLEDGE on Twitter - @THEKIDMERO

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