Photo by Jason Bergman
Carson,
First off, I am sorry.
Not for writing this open letter to you, but because I used to think your band, Merchandise, sucked.
The reason I didn't like your band was not your fault. In fact, I now really like your band. Just this morning, I listened to “Become What You Are” and sang along in the shower. Children of Desire is a genius record and I don't just throw that word around. I mean, okay, you and I know it: we are the recycled generation. We are the regurgitation of our influences and we all sound like those before us, but you guys are paying homage without actually paying homage. I think that’s genius. I also appreciate that you think you just sound like your mother singing to you and not like a British person (which, I assume, is the common comparison you get, duh).
Back to the not-liking-your-band-thing. As I said, not your fault. Our bands played together at some bowling alley in Brooklyn two summers ago. I had been on tour for almost six weeks and was broke and tired and sick of it all. I wasn’t paying attention to anything except my own inner monologue and I thought my life sucked, so I thought the show sucked, so I thought everything sucked. You get it. So, like an airhead prima donna, I wrote your band off without actually listening. For that, I am sorry. I could not have been more wrong.
Obviously, if you are reading this, you have started to question why a sane person would write something like this and that, in fact, I might be insane. I’m writing this because I think it’s kind of insolent, but also kind of flattering and, as you know, the Internet has become the mail and I know you think “all the punks hate Merchandise,” but I’m here to say that is not true. Consider this public fan mail. I think you are a good frontman and I am a front(wo)man too, so it’s like one farmer complementing another on his crops while also admitting at one point, way back when, he pissed on those same crops.
I’m sorry I pissed on your catchy, hook-filled crops.
Sincerely,
Mish Way
-
Ace of Base's Secret Nazi Past
Before he founded Ace of Base, Ulf Ekberg was a member of Commit Suiside, a Nazi punk band.
-
Parquet Courts - "Light Up Gold Road Trip" (Full Documentary)
In this new documentary, Noisey follows rising indie rockers Parquet Courts from Mexico to Texas and London as they tour to support their debut LP, 'Light Up Gold.'
-
Yung Lean Doer Is the Weirdest 16-Year-Old White Swedish Rapper You'll Hear This Week
Yung Lean raps over pillow-fluffy beats and raps about glory holes and Arizona Iced Tea. Who the fuck is this kid? And why is he like this?
-
Adam Ant - The British Masters, Chapter 6
Noisey's John Doran talks with the great post-punk pop star Adam Ant about tribal body mods and layering tape.
-
Photos: Taking Acid at Coachella
When Paley sent these photos in, she included a nice little caveat over email that we've decided to reprint here in full, not only because it's too good to edit, but because her photographs of her and her weird buddies riding the snake are some of the best
-
R.I.P. Storm Thorgerson (1944-2013)
On Thursday, the hyper-talented graphic designer, artist, and famed album cover creator Storm Thorgerson passed away after a battle with cancer. He was 69 years old.
-
The Internet Is Scary
As of six months ago, my Facebook fanpage is like a dojo where hormonal teenagers hone their technique. Here is a heartfelt poem from some kid who wants to rape, kill, and marry me.
-
I Accidentally Touched Little Richard's Butt One Time
It was in the Detroit airport. After it happened Little Richard said, "He graze my derriere."
-
Listen to St. Lucia's Remix of The Colourist's "Little Games"
Last month, Cali quartet the Colourist released "Little Games," and St. Lucia just pulled a warm Balearic blanket over the whole thing, sanding away its rough edges with bright synths and lightly gated percussion.
-
Aaron Montaigne, Godfather of Screamo, is More Interesting Than You Can Ever Hope to Be - Part Two
On surviving combat in Iraq and Afghanistan with the help of magic, 'Bladerunner,' and everything in between.
NOW PLAYING ON YOUTUBE
Comments