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Music

I Go Private: The Best Songs of 2014 from a Scared Spotify User

The sad sad story of a man in pursuit of cool by hiding behind private mode on Spotify.

I feel like it’s only necessary to start this out by defending my musical tastes and how I really enjoyed Code Orange’s I Am King and Youth Code’s A Place To Stand. I could talk about how much I enjoyed how much rap pushed the boundaries of what we thought the genre could be, or how I have sooo many friends that made great music this year. I definitely could do that.

But what’s the point.

I listen to a lot of what you (the reader) would consider bad music, and I listen to it on a daily basis. When it comes time to indulge in these beautifully crafted tunes, I do what most self respecting Spotify users do and flip that lovely little Private Session switch.

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But I’m sick of living in the shadows, and sick of being ashamed of myself so I’ve come to Noisey to air my dirty laundry. These are the top 10 songs that I listened to during my Spotify Private Sessions:

1. Sheppard – "Geronimo"
Sheppard is kind of like Mumford and Sons, if Mumford and Sons didn’t take themselves so god damn seriously and had a couple of babes in their band.

2. Florida Georgia Line – "Cruise Remix"
Baby you a song, you make me wanna roll my windows up and cruise.

3. BABYMETAL - "Doki Doki (star) Morning"
Babymetal is like Attack Attack except some genius decided to replace the ear gauged tatted up bros with a trio of cute little anime girls.

4. Magic! – "Rude"
I one time listened to this song for 24 hours straight by convincing every bartender to put it on as I hoped around town. I even succeeded to get a group of crust punks to admit that they liked the song. AKA I’m a terrible drunk that shoves top 40 radio down people’s ear holes.

5. Walk The Moon – "Shut Up and Dance"
This band kind of sounds like what a Drive Thru Records band would sound like if the label kept going down the road they were heading down. That’s a dis on Drive Thru circa the end and a compliment for Walk The Moon.

6. Rise Against – "Tragedy + Time"
This is actually the first Rise Against song I’ve ever been into. I’m the opposite of the cool guy who’s all like, “I prefer their earlier work”.

7. Zedd – "Find You"
This song makes me feel like the God Zedd must feel like when “drops” it at all of them swanky Las Vegas nightclubs.

8. Taylor Swift – "Blank Space"
Duh. (No preview available since T-Swift decided to yank her music from Spotify. Maybe just hum it to yourself or something.)

9. Maroon 5 – "Maps"
My mom says I look like Adam Levine and that makes feel good about myself. (I look nothing like Adam Levine)

10. She & Him – "It’s Not For Me To Say"
I’m embarrassed to tell people that I’m kind of into She & Him but I’d scream from the mountain tops that New Girl is one the funniest shows on TV.