Ask T-Pain: Am I a Failure?

Photo courtesy of T-Pain

Welcome to Ask T-Pain, our advice column with Auto-Tune maestro and R&B hitmaker T-Pain. Last time, T-Pain answered your questions about staying positive and being creative. This time around, the questions were even more diverse and in-depth. Some of you still sent in your mixtapes and asked T-Pain to tour with you, but mostly you stayed on topic. If you missed last round, it's okay: You can still submit questions for next time by emailing t.pain@noisey.com. Either way, read on. What follows is T-Pain's unfiltered advice.

Dear T-Pain,

I had a very close friend for the past 3 years of my life, and recently after a big fight, we lost our friendship. Now every time I see her around school or see her happy I feel sad because it seems as though she is happy with everyone but me and doesn't care about me anymore. How do I get over my friend and move on with my life?

Sincerely,
Looking for a Friend

Dear LF,

True friendship is by far one of the most important accomplishments you can have in life. I have been blessed and fortunate to find my one true friend/Drankin Patna in my wife Amber. Throughout our relationship we have had many ups and downs. At times I have wanted to pull my dreads out—and most likely so did she LOL. I can hands down say what has made our relationship last and has strengthened the foundation of our friendship are our down times.

Although you may care about someone deeply, this doesn’t guarantee you will get along 100 percent of the time. When you argue, get mad, and walk away, sometimes you realize just how important that person is to you. If you two truly share a bond she may be missing you just as much. Remember absence does make the heart grow fonder! Continue to grow in your own life and remember life has a funny way of making things happen.

Good luck!
T-Pain

Dear T-Pain, I’m 21, and I feel like I’m running out of time. I hope to have a successful career, but even though I have such a great support system and I work extremely hard, I often find myself frustrated and doubtful of my abilities. Is this something that you had to deal with? If so what helped you get past these patches?

Sincerely,
Over the Hill?

Hello Over the Hill!

It’s important for you to know you are not running out of time. Being 21 is such a young and fun age, full of opportunities and experiences. But it is not necessarily a bad thing that you feel like you are running out of time despite the opposite being true. Your feelings only mean you have a huge internal drive. Congratulations: This is one of the main traits of being successful. Never doubt yourself, and use your inner motivation to propel yourself to create, execute and accomplish goals. I have often doubted my own path, but I realize life is about getting from point A to Z. Meaning there is no way to skip the middle letters of the alphabet, which are just as important. You must go to B to get to C and then C to get to D, etc. So slow down and enjoy the journey. Take things one step at a time. If you can do this and feed on your inner motivation you will get everything you set out for in no time!

Sincerely,
T-Pain

Dear T-Pain,

First off, I want to say I am a huge fan of yours, and I've been listening to your music for almost ten years. Now, I want to say that in school, I was a very bright student. I got As and Bs in nearly every class from kindergarten all the way ‘til I graduated from high school. My grade point average was rarely under a 3.0, if ever. I was also very quiet & nice. I was always willing to help another student when they needed help with any work. But somehow, I still ended up being the most hated person in any school I went to. Sometimes, it would be from the same people who would ask me to help them with their work. And they would pick on me mostly because of my good grades. And eventually, it put a damper on my self-esteem and confidence. I was just so saddened by how people could be so mean and rude to such a nice person like me. I graduated from high school a few years ago, and now I'm ready for the next phase in my life, but I'm afraid of people's negativity. I want to go to college and get a nice paying job someday, but I'm afraid that negativity will stop me. How do I deal with negativity, so it wouldn't bother me so much anymore? And why are good things such as having good grades so looked down upon by our youth today?

Sincerely,
GPhAte

Dear GPA,

First and foremost thank you for being a loyal true fan. I am always delighted to hear of people who are lovers of my music and who have been true fans of mine since the beginning. Your question is related heavily to an issue I have dealt with throughout my own youth and career. As a student I, too, was seen as being different, which led me to being pulled out of the regular school system and therefore homeschooled. Throughout my career I have dealt with enormous negativity both on a professional and personal level due heavily to my use of Auto-Tune. My desire to sound different and to be unique instead of being applauded and appreciated became the noose around my neck, so to speak. My best advice to you would be to wear it. Embrace negativity and use it as motivation to further stand out and be the best you can be. Out of every negative comes a positive and being different and/or hated for being good is a problem you will share with most any groundbreaker and pioneer in life. In other words being hated means you are in good company. Negativity turns into positivity and hatred soon turns into admiration, love, and respect!

Sincerely,
T-Pain

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