Artist-Owned Alcohol: An Investigative ReportBy Joey Paradise
Have you heard the news about Qream? Qream (always with a Q) is a liqueur that tastes like Yoo-Hoo mixed with vodka mixed with a palpable feeling of “everything is bullshit and stupid.” It’s made by Pharrell, and if it came in a smaller bottle, stupid people might confuse it for perfume. Anyway, the news about Qream is this: it’s being taken off the market soon, because no one drinks it. I learned this after going to about six different liquor stores in search of it, because I, a sentient human being with a vague modicum of taste, really wanted to drink some. I found nothing. But I ended up with a whole bunch of other shit!
Qream on the shelves or not, you can’t get drunk these days without at least thinking about some alcohol owned by a musician. That’s not true, but there are a lot of liquors that have been put out by music dudes. Last night, my friends and I drank four of them and took pictures of it, and then two of us blacked out. It ruled. Here’s what we thought of everything!
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