50 Cent has the eyes of a man who has stared down death and spat in its face. The thing about death face-spitting is it's transformative. You're a definitively different person once you've been shot nine times. I've met the artist formerly known as Curtis Jackson twice now, and each time has been a disconcerting experience--he's just not entirely there, and it's all in his eyes. Usually this is fine, since as a rapper he plays the role of a cold-blooded killer and heartless lothario, so "Nice Guy Whose Gaze Doesn't Make Babies Cry" is usually not a role he is called upon to play. However, 50's a whip-smart entrepreneur, and he knows that when he's got a product to hawk the quickest way to make it sell is to put his face in front of America and make us remember he made a little album called Get Rich Or Die Trying, so we should open up our wallets and give him all of our money.
This happened yesterday when 50 and his cold, dead doll's eyes hit QVC to hawk his line of SMS headphones, which reportedly sold out in nine minutes. Also, he shamelessly hit on the QVC ladies. It's 100% bizarre, and also I own a pair of the headphones he was selling and they're honestly not that great, even when you're listening to that Onyx song he's on where he raps from the penalty box.
2013: The Year Nelly Was Everywhere and Nowhere at the Same Time
No other artist spent as much time so close to the Zeitgeist as Nelly this year without being even remotely close to being the Zeitgeist.
You Don’t Like Childish Gambino's 'Because the Internet' Because of the Internet
Don't allow the narrative surrounding Donald Glover's musical career define the way you think.
The Real Difference Between a Mixtape and an Album
Why do rappers still about sales when they could release a mixtape, gain exposure, and cash in later?
Are the Grammys Irrelevant or Did Yeezus Actually Suck?
Breaking down Yeezy's obsession with the awards.
2013: A Year In Which Some Music Happened
A year’s art starts on Day One of the new year. If we don’t quantify it somehow by December, who are we as a people and what is our worth?
If R. Kelly Makes Us So Uncomfortable, Why Do We Keep Listening?
This is art we're talking about, and it's as real as you allow it to be.
Britney Spears: Capitalism's Last Stand
At last, the Queen has found her domain.
The Real Rick Ross Stands Up
We met with the ex-crack kingpin, who told us stories from his drug dealing days and gave us an exclusive excerpt from his upcoming autobiography.
Sorry, Dudes. The Ladies Won Punk This Year.
These are the women who kicked a particularly large amount of ass in 2013.
2013: The Most OK Year Ever
Kitty Pryde reflects on her sort of shitty, sort of amazing 2013.